How can I combine the “blueprint for love” I had growing up with the one I want for my family now?
Children often forget the exact words used, but they don’t usually forget how their parents and teachers made them FEEL.
What happens when, in stressful parenting situations, you find yourself resorting to tactics your caregivers used on you in your four walls as a child? How much of putting Tabasco sauce on the tongue, spanking, name-calling, and so on renders authentically good results? How much of it is rooted in compassion, empathy, and grace, and how much of it is driven by ego and pride? Perhaps you feel racked with “parent guilt” because of this. There has to be another way, you say to yourself, but this is the way it’s always been done. This is the only way I know. Do you feel chained down by this kind of thinking?
In this episode, I hope you will be inspired and motivated to break those chains.
Yes, it’s how you grew up — and how did it make you feel then? How does it make you feel remembering what was done to you? The best part of parenting is: YOU make the rules now. Take the parts of your old blueprint that made you feel seen and heard and loved, discard the parts that were unkind or harmful, and fill in the gaps with as much love, grace, and compassion as you can pour out of your little love cup.
You have a unique position while in your second iteration of the parent-child dynamic (this time as the parent) to alter the trajectory of your family line. Yours is the stewardship — the blessing and the responsibility — to break cycles of unconsciousness, ego-driven parenting, and manipulation and abuse of all kinds. What a wonderful opportunity to heal yourself and the generations that follow!
Remember: you’ve got this!
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