Imagine you’re on a flight and the plane starts experiencing serious turbulence. How do you react? If the flight attendants are freaking out, you might also freak out — maybe even start calling people to say your last goodbyes! But if the flight attendants are calmly carrying out their tasks, you may be more inclined to be calm as well.
Children are the same way around their parents and leaders. They need to be exposed to calm, assertive leadership methods so that they don’t freak out and go into the red zone (see episode 89). In my process of becoming a conscious parent, I had to learn to be calm, even when I felt like the situation was spiraling out of control, because my responses to any tiny problem that came up were the equivalent of POURING GAS on a FIRE for my kids’ emotional and psychological health. When I freaked out about little things, that made the little things into big things!!
I’m in my forties and I STILL have a hard time with difficult emotions sometimes! It is TOTALLY NORMAL for a child to have a hard time, because it is their FIRST time! Conscious parenting techniques — practicing mind management, being conscious of your thoughts, accepting the as-is, not assuming malicious intent or irresponsibility when your child does something you do not like, and more — are going to be the key to staying calm and helping your children to stay calm during the “turbulence” you will experience.
I encourage you to step up, accept the challenge to parent consciously, and be the flight attendant your child needs. You’ll help them, and you’ll help yourself as well! You’ve got this!
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